When I was diagnosed, a family friend who had been through breast cancer treatment over 30 years ago called to comfort me. Something she said had a big impact on me. She told me that so many of the women she knew had given up on their drugs (I believe she was referring to hormone blockers) because they felt miserable, so she said "I just decided to tolerate it. I decided. And I did."
Shortly after that, I talked to someone who was being taken off her hormone blocker after 10 years and said she was going to miss it. (Miss it!?!) She said it felt like her security blanket was being taken away.
Until then, it hadn't occured to me that taking an estrogen blocker could be anything but awful. After all, I was on estrogen replacement up until my diagnosis. If I felt good before, didn't that mean that now I would feel bad?
But I decided to tolerate it. I decided. For the first month or so, each time I took my Anastrozole (Arimidex), I paused to look at the bottle and feel grateful for it. I smiled at it. I thought of all the scientists whose work led to these little white pills and thanked them for helping me continue to live my life and be here for my family. And I feel fine. Would I maybe have felt fine anyway? Who knows. Probably. Despite the horror stories I've heard and read, most people tolerate hormone blockers, according to my oncologist. But if you're worried about it like I was, remember that the mind is a medicine cabinet. Placebos can work as well as drugs just because we believe in them. Your thoughts have power.
